Last exam week

Day 11
Worst day ever..... Physic paper 1 and 2..... my mind totally blank while my hand was moving itself (!? Horror movie!?)... I have no idea what I was answering.... and the worst part is, I run out of time to finish my paper 1 T_T I have no hope for my physic.... I have a feeling that I will fail my physic this time....

Day 12
Wednesday, which is TODAY!! >w<~~ Yes!!! I AM SO DAMN HAPPY!!!!!!!! FIRST OF ALL IS! GAZETTE'S NEW SINGLE 「VORTEX」FINALLY RELEASED AND I GET TO DOWNLOAD IT FROM INTERNET!!! (Don't ask me why but I can't find their cd in Popular, MPH or anywhere I go [Sunway and IOI]....T_T I don't think they sell in Malaysia..) I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR TODAY FROM THE FIRST DAY I HEARD THE PREVIEW!! (which is about.... 3 weeks ago...??) THEN! TODAY IS MY FINAL DAY HAVING MY EXAM!! Ok, let me make things clear, I still have my exam tomorrow, but is PSK and PJK which apparently I DON'T CARE about, so I just act that there is no exam tomorrow already! YES! I AM ALREADY IN HOLIDAY MOOD!! I FEEL SO HIGH!! >w<

Random topic: Thank you for letting me know the word "Love"

Ok, why am I talking about this topic? Well, it is because my mandarin (bahasa China) paper 1's essay question... It was "爱，川流不息". While I was doing this question (apparently I chose this question to do), I feel like I suddenly understand a lot of things in this world. Once, I blamed my mom why she gave birth to me, I feel like no hope for life. What makes me feel alive is love, love given by my family and friends. Although these feeling supports me to live, but the feeling of commit suicide still stay deeply in my mind and heart..

When I was writing this essay, I was thinking about love of family and friends and stuff like that... Also, what's love. Love is Sun, Moon which brighten one's life; love is grass which even are burned into ashes, they will still grow again easily; love is river, a river which will not stop flowing, with no ending.. I wrote until the last paragraph, suddenly, I think of the love I give out, the love I give to my family, friends, GazettE!! (...??), ANIME!!!! (what the..) and the person I like (or admire). When I think of these, I feel so happy and I finally feel happiness. I am already very lucky, to have someone to love me (family and friends I mean), and someone I love...

It is kinda weird that I finally understand and know the happiness of loving someone... (: So I do not blame anymore, I want to say:"Thank you for giving me birth, my mom. Thank you for giving me a chance to love someone, to know such a wonderful word..."

*As I said, it is just a random topic... so, don't take it too serious or ...anything... (:*

Exam week 2

Day 7
Judgement day!!! 'Yes! Today is Additional Mathematics..... and I have plenty of question which I don't know how to do and I just simply did them.... 0-0... which I lost almost..erm... 14 - 20 marks....I guess... for only paper 1! Can you imagine that?! xDD then my paper 2... lost almost....well, around 10 marks... :D (P.S: My question 3a) in paper 2, I just tembak the equation and left half hanging.... b) and c) is totally BLANK!! xDD And, I am quite sure that my question 4 are all wrong...) Ha ha.. almost everyone was smiling to each other before exam, wishes each other good luck, or:" Ha ha, let's die together.. xDD" or something like that, lot's of different kind... (And there was actually one person wishing teacher good luck for.. erm, I don't know.. xDD); after exam, some (I am one of them) still maintained their smile on their face, saying :" Ha ha! Do you know how to do? No, right!? Which question? Oh that! Ya, I also don't know, high 5!" or something like that... What we know is: We are dead for our Add Maths xD (and so on...=.= )


Day 8
Chinese...... a ha ha ha.. unexpectable hard.... done (what...!?) Ok ok! is not yet done! The paper 2 was so hard.... ok, done. (WHAT!?)


Day 9
Biology... ok... was... not that hard... but not that easy... Or should I say... there are some easy question which I know the answer and I answered wrong...?? T^T bye bye ...for my bio.....


Day 10
Chemistry paper 3... Oh well, one word... is WAY MORE EASIER THAN PAPER 1 AND 2 ! HA HA!! but.... if I got less than 20 marks for this paper.... I will be dead then...... I am relying on the marks of my paper 3 so....

ok... I am really very lazy to type every thing out already..... xD

Exam week 1

Day 2 (In fact that, we already start exam last Friday)
Shoot... Is bahasa Melayu today... >< I am dead.... seriously... It was Mother's day yesterday... ( P.S: Is not Monday already when I am writing this....) So I don't really get to study... (Don't mistaken! I do not blame Mother's day!!) Or should I say I don't know what to study? Oh well, who cares? As long as I pass.... wait... will I pass....?? (T T) During recess, I went up to 2nd floor to meet up Nee-chan and Sora-chan for some discussion about our band "Chronos number".. Well, this and that are not really the main point.. the main thing I write for this "Day 2" is, after our exam... Frustrated by my Moral teacher...

The story started after we (My classmates/schoolmates and me) finish our exam, *time 13 10* usually we can go back home already, can't we? Well... our 'brilliant' Moral teacher wanted us to stay in our class until 13 45 and the reason is because our usual non-examination day finished at 13 45. Well, I can not blame too much because is my fault anyway. I forgot Moral teacher wants us to stay until 13 45, she told us last exam. I told my mom to fetch me back at 13 10, but then my brother is the one who fetch me back when I went out, wanted to tell mom that I have to stay until 13 10. My brother sounds a bit annoyed when I tell him... "shoot.... I am dead..", this is what I was thinking when I was walking back to my class... I am so afraid of my brother that he will scold me to hell when I am back... So, I cried...

About this, I am thinking of saying thank you to Moral teacher.. Kinda irony because of this case, Mia came and sat down in front of me, asking me why I am crying. Although is a while only, but I am already very happy.. As she doesn't look like want to be my friend, or mad at me or something like that... Usually she will not talk to me or find me... I even talk to her after school.. xD
Ah, luckily my brother isn't angry with me.. Instead of angry with me, he angry my teacher while scolding me brainless.. xDD but he talk to me after we reached home, which means he is not angry with me.. xDD


Day 3
English today... xDD I thought it will be better than Monday but I was wrong... I don't get enough time to finish my last paragraph for my paper 1 section B.... Doom.... Whatever, I also don't care... As long as I don't get 'B' .... wait... can I get A...?? (T T) *Wait... why it sounds so familiar??* Nothing really special, or should I say I don't want to care? I reached home and wait for my pastor to my home for some issue about my church's camp.

I was taking my nap when they rang my door bell. (Pastor and another church guy, counted as my friend) I played my anime medly terribly , then the song "Pledge" by GazettE!!! Which I just printed out on Monday. Well, they chose anime medly because it is shorter (In fact that I cut shot a lot...) and is more dramatically then "Pledge" ... I want to choose Pledge more than anime medly as I love GazettE and is really very nice, well, I am not saying I don't like anime, I LOVE ANIME!! and anime medly also very nice :D...... (T^T) ... (=^=)... wait.. I thought I am going to play 2 songs? Perhaps.... I still have the chance to play "Pledge" !! Good... will discuss with them again on this Saturday....


Day 4
Ok...finally... Mathematics. Ha ha! I was so confused with those Venn diagram and it came out more than 4 question of this chapter! Yes! Another subject doom! Ha ha!! Ok... tomorrow is Moral.... hope nothing really happen.....


Day 5
Lolz... I have no comment for Moral...... What I want to say is, I almost wrote the word "membunuh" ... (0_0) violence! xDD


Day 6
Chemistry! I love it! but! I have no idea what the hell I I was answering for my paper 2 and 1!! xDD I was like, looking at my paper and my mind went blank.... Trying to find answers for those question from my blank mind is quite hard... So, I am now counting on my paper 3.... hope it is easier... although I think is impossible...... (- -'') Ok! I better study my Add maths now! Next Monday is Add maths..... (T, T)

Random topic: Love?? and Music~~

Ok... I am just an ordinary teenage girl who will talk about love and even fall in love (what!!??). Ok, ok! I know is an odd thing for me to talk about this kind of topic as for those who knows me well knows I am a person who love to fight, anime hardcore, GazettE lover, lifeless (....- -), love music so much~! and is...a bit violence??!! And I feel kinda... heart break as I think of him... Why? Oh well, I will explain why.. just please DON'T ASK WHO IS HIM!!! >< and don't you dare to ask a single word about this....(then... WHAT ARE YOU WRITING THIS FOR!?)

First of all, almost everyone says love in secondary school is just puppy love, don't take it easy and stuff like that. Then is, find someone who is older than you. Next is, don't find someone who is same age as yours and much more... Done... everything is just sound... so against on me.. and to add on, he doesn't know this, and he doesn't really talk to me... So I will just forget him and look in front. Yes... I have to forget... so concentrate on my study...

Talking about study, just reminds me my piano...yes... I have my piano exam on July or August, I still don't know when is the actual date and I hope it will fall on Friday, as Friday is the final school day for a week. Well, I just have few words for this exam: "I am doomed..." yes.... I already stop practicing my exam pieces and scales.... oh my GOSH! HOW THE HELL SHALL I SURVIVE FOR MY TEST!!!?? Oh well, I will just pretend I am sick and absent for it~ (DON'T YOU DARE!)

Haiz... stress... with lots of stuffs... In school, I feel like I can't make my friends laugh or smile... is really sad ... I even cry for quite a long time... at house... well I shouldn't talk about anything about this so I will just skip this part and move on to the next point. Study, talking about study, makes me wanna say:"Oh my~~ Gosh~!!" and "Woah~~ What the hell~!", I think need not to say much about it already. Last but not least, my favourite part, piano and violin~!! I love to play my piano, but I hate scales and scale book... T.T tears drop.... violin.... I stopped already... but I love violin so much same as the love I have on piano, just like it is as important as my friends' life... Well, I will just listen to some songs and dance crazily and also have some HEAD BANG TIME!! ... ok... that's all...- -

Once again, my deepest gratitude to everyone who read my blog.. (: *bow down*

A little opinion about my future xD (but is kinda lame..= =)

Lately I have been thinking about how will my future be?? Someone had suggested me to do some jobs which can earn money, not just follow what I think. After I listened to this, I had think a lot. Here's a question, if you like to play violin or other instrument like piano, and you aim to be a violinist (or pianist or perhaps... the conductor! xD) in an orchestra (not famous) which can't earn too much, then someone told you to choose a better job which may earn more money but you may not have much interest in it. So, which will you choose?? Well, a smart person will choose the 2nd one which is with more payment, and so my mom and brother said.

Just a moment, I was thinking to work in some office until I am old, but I feel so lifeless (ok, I admit my current life is already counted as lifeless life, said by my friends...). Life is so short that may even ended so sudden, so I hope I could make my life more colourful (?).

I start to think about some jobs that is danger such as police, CSI, detective and also lawyer (for criminal case), extremely "colourful"! Conclusion is: My mom not allowed, except for lawyer. Next, something that is free (not work time), means I need not to stay in a room looking on my computer (for work not play) or paperwork like a stewardess, photographer and jobs like that... Conclusion: I can't marry. How about singer? I was asking myself, but how to get in a singing company and what if I am not famous? Too much of question... So I just put that as my 2nd or 3rd option. After few days or weeks (can't remember clearly), I was thinking of being a psychologist and will take courses related to music like psychology of music.

Settle everything now, I can help people also can study music~! Why I want to be a psychologist? Well, that's because I am happy when I look someone is happy especially when someone is happy because of me. Also, I know the feeling of having some mental problem, like... the most normal problem, overwhelmed with stress. I wish I could help people so I will just choose this. xDD

*Caution: Here's the lame part*
Oh well, no one's knows their future so I will just let it be~~ xDD

Freindship

What is friendship? Well, in my opinion, friendship is a candle, a candle which should be protected by both, but sometimes, maybe the wind will blow till both can't protect the fire. Never mind, as long as the fire does not extinguish, it still will burn brightly till the life of two ends.... maybe sometimes something happen, one left the candle, or the fire blow off. Never mind, just light it up again, because once it happens to be in related, no matter it is friends or acquaintance, it can't be erased. I will do my best to protect this fire with my every single friend....